One thing I like about academia is the natural cycle to the year. The semester is nearly at an end, with just some grading to wrap up. I have also finished my first class from U. Dubuque. (Their semesters are shorter than ours. Started after, finished earlier, with a break now until February.) So it’s time to do a little reflection.
Back in early summer, I was at a loss for what the next phase of my life might be. There are a lot of external uncertainties: my family, my church, my employer/campus, my career, my community, and my country all are in a state of flux. I was a little overwhelmed with it all. So much beyond my control, so much that I wanted to do. I’m the kind of person who likes to have a plan.
Some things have happened between then and now that confirm the path I’m on. I’ve received a couple of major grants, so my career is not a significant concern. My experience with the U. Dubuque course was very positive, with lots of learning and lots of positive feedback from the professor and other students. Conversations that I’ve had with a couple of mentors have helped me see the positives in my life.
I’m learning to deal with the uncertainties of life. My friend Sharon’s mantra is helpful: “Do the best you can with what you have, where you are today.” It’s a continual process, of course. But I’m not paralyzed with indecision as often as in the last few years.
Most importantly, a few things have happened in the past couple weeks that really confirm my desire to build a ministry to the LGBTQ community. I can’t divulge any of the details, but suffice it to say that I’ve stepped out in faith and been rewarded with new connections. In case it wasn’t clear from my sermons and other writings, I very much believe that gay, transgender, and other queer individuals have a place in God’s Kingdom. Not as second-class citizens, not as people who have to deny their true nature, but as equals in the eyes of God.
At this point, I’ve done just barely more than the minimum. I’m formally a More Light Presbyterian, but haven’t actually done anything with that organization. Most days, I wear two bracelets: one a silicone rainbow that I got at a Pride parade, the other a Jesus fish. The idea is to communicate the fact that they go together: I believe in gay rights because of my faith, not in spite of it. I have a Safe Space sign outside my office door.
OK, I’ve done the minimum and was rewarded by the Spirit’s leading. What’s next?
There are two things that I see missing in Rolla. One, there is no religious organization that is explicitly affirming of LGBTQ individuals. Every day, I drive past the corner of 10th & Pine St and see, usually, anti-gay or anti-transgender messages from a Christian group. Nowhere in town, though, do I see an affirming message, neither Christian nor secular. Two, there is no real support for LGBTQ individuals who are not affiliated with Missouri S&T. (Students on campus can visit SDI; faculty and staff at least have the Title IX office.)
Now, being straight, I’m fairly limited in what kind of guidance I can give, and I need to remain humble, realizing that I cannot know what a gay person wants or needs or has experienced. Being a full-time university employee, I’m fairly limited in how much time I can put into off-campus endeavors. Still, there must be a way for me to work towards filling that first need, the need for an open and affirming Christian organization. One of my goals for 2019 is to figure out what that might look like, and then to take steps in that direction.